umbilikal

Muted Future Tonight we dance with our feet in the air Our hair swinging wildly with no thought behind Truth and beauty appear everyday Every time we blink or turn away, such is the truth in beauty We turn away from all we have and all we know In hopes of discovering what could have been If only we would have said those words weeks ago But no voice can ever be heard in the past And most pasts mute the expected futures we design for ourselves When we feel our lives are in control But control can never be attained to the desired level Our imaginations rule perception of our abilities June 15, 2001

Along The Circle Am I really outside of everything? Am I really outside of this? Constant circular motion Paving the way for days to come Am I really outside with you? Placed and removed, the pressures melt away Their residue is passed backwards Along the circle on which they hang Strangely, apathy sets in as the lines bend further Blinking will not clear the feeling Not until you wake up with your face in the mud Is it time now? You as the solitary survivor should ask Is it time now to realize? Maybe history will repeat and make you smile Is it time now to realize what she has done? Or will a curve in the line cause fresh fr

Realization Don't contradict your previous underlying motives Why have you changed beyond recognition? I won't accept you until reversal occurs But I know it won't, not for me at least Not while I write and am inspired Required to write what others say First in their corners, then to your face React somehow, please Don't just frown and forget existence Not your own but of the lives of your brothers Are you willing in as much as you speak? Willing to reevaluate molded ideals You didn't even inherit them They were taught with tears But isn't that the only way The only way I will ever learn And maybe not step beyond my abilities

Plastic Umbilikals Maybe you're better off alone Maybe you're better off sane I should seek fulfillment now And back out slowly from the mire Sheath my sword and scramble back down the hill You claim to sit at its bottom But I see you standing at the top And from there you will see me fall Grinning and crying, you'll be calmer inside Admitted dissonance feeds separation Unless we're kissing our hearts out on a cold Friday night Our goals merge eventually when you realize their faults Your shoulders are unburdened from the paternal cross And the weight is removed by default elimination Of plastic umbilicals; Of fake mother's l

 Sit Still Sit still stranger. I am the life of your mind, The bringer of truth. Peace is sought in my embrace, I welcome you. Sit still my friend, Time is of no essence here. You are beyond your flesh. Do not look back to yourself For you were but an illusion. Sit still my child, Your past is before you. Recall the last dance you enjoyed And forget its meaning, Your birth is awaiting you. February 5, 2001

Desert Traveler Trapped within the hallowed ground, I'm seeing all that I should feel. My words flow freely from the sands. The only traveler, I walk on by. Should I stop and quench those around me? I've tried and failed so many times. And I'm not the only one praying for water, Not the only one sowing green pastures. We seek the promise of our fathers; Each traveler blind to the other. Our numbers dwindle into the dunes. Alone we ponder our liberation; Salvation seems so far away. Now blinded by the sun we wander, And hallowed ground grows ever barren. Through our lives the harsh winds blow. And I'm not the only one praying

The Clearing I think this is relief that shakes me Those sleepless nights seem so pointless now And bedside words irrelevant As we stand beyond the tree line This place, this open space, sings to some They watch the weather change A stagnant pool solidifies For those that ask forgiveness Of the friends they never wronged Together we walked below the approaching storm I was among those that remained Standing and sighing As we spoke morituri te salutant to our lives But we knew it was otherwise Our death had already come; The storm passed over us In this field I found others: Smiling and wandering Yet feeling free above all H

Creature of Change Transformed, you sit among the creatures; But unchanged, you mingle with the familiar. The façade grows freely. Its vines extend to family, friends Speak of your framed achievements. Change is far from constant in you. You creature of change, you have failed you existence. One must grow and develop to be called alive. Fear not death before you for it does not touch, You sit in a field filled with old rusted doors. March 6, 2001

Venture Follow me through when I stop whispering Cripple my fears, then venture eagerly We're always so close, yet never quite within Our desired lives are fading rapidly Thank you apathy Forget summertime Forget loving me Celebrate the measuring, then deepening, of our chances for confidence in each other Replace pride with faith Mistakes of my fathers My mother's refrain Repeat again Your faded influence is a welcome hope to me So sorry now, I'll retract quietly Thank you apathy Forget summertime Forget loving me Colder, now light this candle for me Tempered, now mold me anyway Mindless, now pull out everything This is

 A Step Too Late The line inches forward. Yet you still cannot see what is before you. Feet shuffle forward in an attempt to pass time, And the sun beats down on your naked shoulders. A smile flashes across your parched lips as a son beats his naked father. The father smiles back; Joyful as his vision clears with every step, every wince. Minds wander in search of the same joy, But find only gleaming necks and tramping feet. Only when it is your turn, When your sight is unobstructed, Do you glimpse the truths set down at creation. All memories lose their potency, all actions their impact. You imagine how you could have lived, A

Jesse is smiling at me from the edge of the bed with that concerned inoocent look that makes it difficult to talk and all I have to say is, "i love you," to get myself started and all I want to do is stand up put my mouth to his forehead whisper poems into his skin and he can gather all that I really should be saying right now here as if through osmosis stand in subtley combined static and TV snow and blinking red flashlights make due with the unmade bed two bodies sleeping more poetic than the words I could be saying right here in this space between the floor and the first bed post in the time between m